Why Am I Changing Light Bulbs?

Being an ecologically conscious kinda guy, about three years ago, I went through my house and replaced my incandescent bulbs with CF bulbs. It was hugely expensive because I bought good GE brand bulbs. I saw it as an investment. Not only would the bulbs save energy, but they would last a thousand years.

Yes, a thousand years, damn it. They said the bulbs lasted five times longer than "normal" bulbs. They said that even though they cost more, they don't really cost more when you consider the cost of all the bulbs you won't have to buy in the future. And you're saving energy.

Yeah, because they put out half the light of normal bulbs. One bathroom had a two bulb fixture. If you walked into the bathroom in the middle of the night, it took five minutes for the lights to power-up. (I was already "done" by then.) So, I changed one of the CF bulbs for a normal bulb. For short jobs, the incandescent bulb fires up giving us 50% light, and for jobs taking more than 15 minutes, the CF gets us up to 90%. And still saves energy.

But the CF bulb has burned out. Not the normal bulb. The CF that was suppose to last five times longer! What's the deal? It's almost like they lied to me... or something.

Oh now: lets not loose sight of what's important. I'm saving the planet. I'm being environmentally aware. The CF bulbs reduce my carbon footprint. And they contain deadly levels of mercury that is sufficiently toxic that improper disposal is criminal in some jurisdictions.

Now if you'll excuse me, I've got some endangered tigers that need to be shot.